Year 2012 has been one whacked out year. Right now I am thinking back what had happened; I still cannot explain what went down. I was in some zombie state living versus living the life what I want to be living. I picked up an old book I read few years ago while drinking Starbuck’s café mocha and re-read, “No more Mr. Nice guy” by the author Robert Glover. I rediscovered what Integrated Male meant to us.
Integrated male possesses following attributes: (These traits must be incorporate to be a genuine male)
- He has a strong sense of self. He likes himself just as he is and sold on himself 100%.
- He takes responsibility for getting his own needs met.
- He is comfortable with his masculinity and his sexuality.
- He has integrity. He does what is right, not what is expedient.
- He is a leader. He is willing to provide for and protect those he cares about.
- He is clear, direct, and expressive of his feelings.
- He can be nurturing and giving without care-taking or problem-solving.
- He knows how to set boundaries and is not afraid to work through conflict.
Doing something different (Addendum):
- Accept themselves just as they are.
- Use their mistakes as valuable learning tools.
- Stop seeking the approval of others. (This applies to women, especially their friend’s approval)
- Experience loving and intimate relationships.
- Make their needs a priority.
- Find people who are able and willing to help them meet their needs.
- Learn to give judiciously, with no strings attached.
- Face their fears.
- Develop integrity and honesty.
- Set boundaries. Drop bad behaviors.
- Build meaningful relationships with men.
- Create healthier, more satisfying relationships with women.
- Experience and express their feelings.
- Deal with problems directly.
- Develop an intimate and satisfying sexual relationship.
- Find peace with the changing complexities of life.
Can you incorporate these traits? A must to do list for being a genuine real man. Robert Glover is a genius! – SjC